YEAH, Houston!

I know you have that gimmicky ballpark where an elementary school kid can hit a homerun in left field. Oh yeah, and you have a flagpole, and a hill in center field. But, we'll forget about that advantage to the home team. Granted, you covered the field with your "dome". Why you need a dome in Houston is beyond me. Why did you close the dome, by the way? There was no rain! Noise? No, you wouldn't cheat.

I guess we'll just see how a team plays in a real ballpark, where stats aren't fudged by a false homerun into left field, or where your fielders practice running up hills to catch a ball.

You have two games to prove yourself, Houston, and two games only. After that, consider building a new ballpark. Perhaps one less corny.

Will the new Busch Stadium be a real stadium? No doubt. It will have no railroad track. No short left field fence. No tricks. It is a baseball field that you will encounter at any High School or College team plays. No tricks, no jokes. No stupid angles. Just smart fans who know who the real champion is.

Oh yeah, the Red Sox suck.

Is anyone else tired of...

traffic

David Spade

fishing and hunting on TV

waking up hungover

phone calls with nobody on the other line

the New York Yankees

rising gas prices

politics

catching shoplifters

waking up early

losing touch with friends

TV

stalkers

dreams that you need to go back to high school to take courses that you missed the first time

people asking you what you want to do with your life

computer related problems

roaming on your cell phone

losing pocket knives and flashlights

people who complain (or is that what I'm doing here? Damn)